Friday, January 8, 2010

.:: THREAT ::.

Her mobile phone rang.
She was expecting this phone call. Her heart began to race. She grabbed the phone, wiped her tears with the back of her hands, and pushed the answer button.

"Muahahahaha!!" The evil laugh echoed in her ear canal.
"Please don't do anything to him. Don't hurt him" -she was on the verge of breaking down.
"Give me back the disks, and you will have him back in once piece. Don't act smart, I mean stupid..."
"Muahahahaha!!" The evil laugh echoed in her ear canal, again, like a bad replay.

..
..

She had poked her nose into "business" that was nothing to do with her. Her conscious swung like the tail of a bull cow.She had to make a choice between,doing the right thing and saving her most loved one; that means, closing her eyes to the evil thing.
Else her most loved one will be in deep bull shit and what ever drops out of the situation.
"Oh NOO!!!"
..
..

Earlier that day, she had stumbled across something that had changed the outlook on her life completely. She felt jitters, when she saw that. Her blood froze.The giant Ferris wheel of her fantasy came loose of its screws and plunged deep into the coldness of her arteries. She could never imagine her cousin brother involved in "such things".
She closed the door behind her and walked out of his room.

..
..

Her conscious made lots of noise, like two skeletons making out in a filing cabinet. She could not concentrate on the book she was reading. The thought grew on her like a colony of E-coli on a piece of beef. There are two things, she can do. Her face lit up like an alcoholic who saw nail polish remover. Her's was a small idea, but worth a kick.
She made her plans.
..
..

Her cousin, came home after a wonderful cricket match. He went into his room, He had this gut feeling that somebody was in his room. He suddenly saw movement behind him. He turned around and...
"Hmm...You searching for this?" She asked him, his 'movie disks' clutched tightly in her hands. She was smiling,her lip curved like the side of a blunt stainless steal plate, her words dripping in sarcasm. It dripped all around him, nearly flooding him.

She was playing Mario on him, with her words.
"Its' not mine." He said.
"Don't lie to me, I got all your dirty movie collection and I am going to tell this to your parents"
"Errr...No, you won't" He murmured.

He was scheming in his mind. If he jumped on her and grabbed the 2 CD's, she would use her default weapon "Ear splitting Scream".- The weapon of mass attention, and then it's game over for his 'political' career at home. He would loose the CD's and his dignity. He need to 'play down' the situation.
He need to keep her talking, and then punch in with words at the right time, capitalizing on it.The standard operating procedure in such situation. If she really wanted to snitch on him, she would have done that by now and he would have had a 'reception committee' by now. That means, there is either a pardon or a 'life long threat', which he could negotiate. He smiled back at his Cdcide bomber. He don't want to panic her and make her gallop into pressing the 'Shrreeeek button.' He need to buy time.
..
..

His demands for safe passage of his movie disks were made.She wanted HIM to recharge her mobile phone, when ever she needs. Unlimited pocket money... The list was endless. He was in crisis. He felt like he was the little dot in the PC-Man game. She wanted some 'ransom amount' up front; "That's just a start". she said.

"Women are like the police. They can have all the evidence in the world, but they still want a confession."- Some Genius

..
..

This is the first time in his life, that a 5 ft 3 inch carbon based life form is standing as a threat to him and his freedom. She was downstairs, talking on the phone, probably making up a shopping plan with her friends, with his money. Guided by his instincts, he went inside her room, planning a counter operation to rescue his gorgeous babes in the movies from the clutch of her vicious claws.
His eyes were blinded by so much pink. Noooo!!! his eyes were not naturally adapted to see such extreme colors. He felt like a black grape in strawberry milk shake inside the room.
But alas! his search of her room yielded (0) result(s).

His eyes fell on her prized possession. He abducted it.
"Chance favors the prepared mind." He said this awesome quote and walked out of the room with her most sentimental possession.

..
..

He called her on her mobile, though they were in the same home. He always dreamed of playing the role of "Don Corleon".

She took the call.

He: I am goooing thu make yoo an offerrr, you caun't refuose.

She:Ha Ha ha. You are talking like a drunk Russian.

He:Pish..pish..pish....Sthop laughing yoo, silly sthupid buthterfly.

She:WHAT? Ya know what happens to little kids who doesn't behave?

He:Oh!! Whath happens tu them?

She:Their CD's get broken one by one.You are soo asking for it.

He:I wanth thu make a deel. Justh check the message I am sendin yuu..

[He sends her this beautiful picture.]

She:NOOO!!! You won't do that to him.

He:I won'th du thatt tu him, I will make it look like a sooicide. Try me! Give me back my movie disks, no scratch, nothing. Understood. I give you back your sthupid him. Don't make me a monster of nostredame.Muhahahahahahaha..Muhahahahahaha..

She:____

He:Cat got your tongue? [ He always wanted to say that too]

____________________

Yeah in the end, he got his awesome movie disks back and her smelly teddy bear was given back, of course with head on its body, intact.
We guys are not cruel, no?

__________________________+

42 comments:

M. said...

Lol. You are insane!

M. said...

Oh, here is the :p.

Love your 'stuff'.

M.

Sorcerer said...

@mayur
thank you.

Nona said...

The last I hear your cousin is out there with "supari" for sketching you. :)

Be careful.. he he he he

farh said...

Footnotes

*based on a true incident which occurred in March 1886

End of .

Wow! Extinct. . . . ummm contemporary story! ;)

Sorcerer said...

@nona
me?
me=soo innocent.

that guy in the story is Not me.
its a fictitious fictional character.

Sorcerer said...

@far
Not true incident. I dont keep such disks in my home cuz I have a nosey cousin,(a guy) whose nose is designed to sniff out such stuffs.

you see..Iam innocent. no?

farh said...

So you mean you destroy the disks or rather shift their home before the nosey guy sniffs it out!

SOrcerer said...

@farh
yeah, we have a scape goat to do that. A safe keeper..the man with the key kinda things..
muaahaa..muaahahaha..muaahahahahahaha..muahahahahahahahaaaa...

*and many muahahaha's

SOrcerer said...

@farh
yeah, we have a scape goat to do that. A safe keeper..the man with the key kinda things..
muaahaa..muaahahaha..muaahahahahahaha..muahahahahahahahaaaa...

*and many muahahaha's

SindhuBhairavi said...

OMG.. i have been thru that situation!! :) i mean the girl one ! but it wasnt funny like this.. i wasnt clever like that girl! so handed all the stuff to the headoffice and got the poor guy in hell!! paavam.. :)

this was yet another post where i laughed aloud and he asked.. what??? i said am reading sorcy.. ! and i see the fumes of jealousy in his eyes.. u are becoming famous.. !

the descriptions in the post were truly funny.. too many to mention here..

Anonymous said...

Hahaha Nice..
I thought it was some hero's poster :P
You wrte it in a nice way..good good :)
ANd Boys are not 'not-cruel':P

Rex Venom said...

Whoa. That was a close one.
Good thing all made it out safe.
Rock on!

D said...

hahahahaha Sorcy.... u should tell the truth u know... u should let the world know when girls get the better of u...





though this fictional story(loosely based on real life..hint hint) was AWESOME!

Anonymous said...

Good one!

Unknown said...

Love that.*wipes tears of laughter* LOL love every bit of it!

Sakshi said...

Waaahhhh... Lovely story. :) and so real.

Ashley said...

"Conscious swung like the tail of a bull cow"-LOL :))
Insanely funny! Loved this. :D

Megha said...

hmm...teddy bear ?

Well, i liked the Don corleone one ;)

Saurabh Panshikar said...

Lol@ the tail thing!

Disks?
Watever happened to the hidden folders (all named "System")

KittySigurdardottir. said...

So GOD designed your cousin's nose to sniff out disk CD's.Can you describe it?It must be a fabulous nose.Does she then tell on them after sniffing them out?

I think that if my nose would sniff out guys with disk CD's, I would call for a private meeting with the men and let them know that I had found out their dirty little secret and that they need deliverence of their addiction like I got.Then I would ministrer to them and try and point in the right direction,of course it would be easier if I had a husband to help me with this hot issue,that goes without saying,I would not want the guys to try to hit on me see.

DILLIGAF said...

....oh yes we are.

That, old bean, was pure class!

sulagna said...

sucha nice dics based story..sorry sorry typo...disc based i meant!!

:) niacceee

санжог said...

Saucer!!

HA HA HA HA HA HA, where the hell do you get these ideas from!!

Quirky said...

Lol.. N Mr.Sorcy.. thou shall not harm/make fun of teddyz no matter how old/dirty/smelly they are! *Runs away before Sorcy hits back with more jokes on galz love for teddyz* ;)

shail said...

You do write interesting stuff! :)

Ramit Grover said...

Dude, you should get published. Honest!

:)

Sorcerer said...

@shail
yeah..weird would be aprt word..i think
thank you for the comment

@quirky
Deddy bears.. They are smelly! I mean.Gwad.smell one and you can go ACCHOOO!!! ACCHOOO!!!(*Sneeze) all day long.

@Sanjog
guru!!
*sits in contemplation

@Fourdinners
:)
thank you for the awesome comment

@barbie Jones
kids!! they know the right place to look for when it comes to stuffs.

@saurabh
Nope!
Smart you see..

@megha
yeah!! who dont like. "I am gonna make an offer you cant refuse.

@Ashley
metaphors..simileys!! I like to help my readers..visualize the situation..

@sakshi
Yes I noticed the sarcasm in that comment ."So real"
thank you
thank you for the comment

@the schmuck
thank you for the comment

*gives her a tissue paper

@mia999
thank you for the comment

@D
you!! Wait till I make 'non revocalble' peace agreement with Juggie..
After that D
Its GAME OVER for U. (hint hint)muaahhaha..Muahahahaha..Muahahaha..

@Rexvenom
seee..you know..we have the special ability to 'negotiate' way out of situation.

Long live..CDs'

@Yemiledu
Yeah! thanks for understanding
Guys are 'NOT CRUEL'. We are just.smart!!
thanks for the comment

@Sindhu Bhairavi
Thank you for the comment
See..YOu should not have done that to that guy,

"On the eightth day, there was porn, and God Said, "let this be a blessing onto you, since Eve is out shopping""

thank you for reading my posts and commenting..

__
comments are like coffee you see

Sorcerer said...

@the bald guy
*sigh..
Even I wish for an contract of a billion dollars for my awesomeness
But you seee
*sigh

Megha said...

Teddies are cute...but not to give in to such good oppurtunity.. :)

Sorcerer said...

@megha
deddys are smelly!

Anonymous said...

I said men are NOT "not-cruel".

:P

Shriti said...

haha sorcy!
LOL
from where do you get such ideas??
LOOOOOOL :p

Meenakshi said...

hehehehe.. wonderful post.. but i do think your cousin did let you go very easily.. all that evidence for an old teddy.. she could have got the entire Archies range at home with that evidence..

hmm.. girls are real sweet hearts. :)

*** sadly thinking y none of my cousin brothers ever give such a chance..need to start ransacking their rooms.. (evil plans brewing)

rohini said...

another a gr8 one...thnx for making us all laugh....

Sorcerer said...

@yemiledu
oaaaa...double negative
hmm...okay!!
*sigh

@chocolate lover
what an idea madam g.what an idea..

@meenakshi
deddy bears... muaahahaha!! actually people underestimate us guys.

good luck with the mission ran sack.

@rohini
:)
thanks for the comment

Renu said...

Lol: good narration, so you are 5'3":)

Sorcerer said...

@Renu
me is not 5 ft 3

the girl in his story is 5ft 3

Neethu said...

God! the metaphors you use!....they r insane!:P

Sorcerer said...

@neethu
gee..thanks for the comment and complement!

Sumi Mathai said...

dont act smart ..i mean stupid !!!! gihahahahha

skeletons making out on a tin sheet...height of noise!!
lota similes sorcy..guess they are ur fav tool..

u rock!!

Sorcerer said...

@me
haha.. thank you for the comment
yeah!! i love to describe things My way!!for easy understanding of my readers

thanks for the comment