Saturday, March 13, 2010

.::LUNGI::.

The national bird of Kerala is declared as Mosquito and the national dress is 'Lungi' or 'Mundu'.

This blog post is about the awesome trendy dress called ..'Lungi' or 'Mundu'.Pronounced as 'Lu' as in loo and 'ngi ' as in 'mongey'; lungi can be identified by wonderful floral patterns or patterns like that of window curtain on it.'Mundu',is normally white in color and is worn on special occasions like 'Harthal' days, marriage days etc etc.

Lungi, is simple and 'down to earth' like that of a mallu.[Don't ask!]. Lungi is the only dress that has reached the apex of evolution in it's category.
Wearing something on the top half of your body is optional when you are wearing a lungi. This is the reason why females are not found wearing this awesome dress. [*sigh]
Lungi is a strategic dress. It's like a one size fit all pajama for Keralites.

The technique of wearing a lungi/mundu is passed on from generation to generation through verbal communication. If you think it is an easy task to wear it. you are wrong! It requires lot of techniques, including breathe control. A lungi/mundu when perfectly worn won't come off even if it showed 8 on the richter scale.
A lungi is not attached to the waist using duct tape, staple,rope or velcro. it's a bit of mallu magic whose formula is a closely guarded secret like that of Coca Cola ingrediants.

"Wearing a lungi and managing to keep it up there is tougher than flying a MIG. I can fly a MIG with eyes closed, but not wear a lungi..*sigh:- A retired MIG pilot who doesn't liked to be named.


[Lungi worn at Full Mast]


A lungi can be worn 'FULL MAST' or 'Half Mast'. Like the flags of nation flown at different heights, a lungi can be worn at different heights.
A 'Full Mast' lungi is when you let the gravity do the work and wear it hiding your sexy hairy awesome one of a kind bombastic yoohoowoohooo legs. When you are showing respect to an elderly or someone dead [Too elderly, that is], a lungi/mundu is worn at full mast. Wearing it at full mast has lots of disadvantages, rather than advantages. A major disadvantage can be experienced when the neighbour dog 'Pintu mon' runs after you. When you are wearing a lungi/mundu at full mast, the advantage is mainly for the chicks and the woman folks.


[Lungi Worn at Half Mast]

Wearing a lungi 'Half Mast' is when you wear it exposing your sexy hairy awesome one of a kind bombastic yoohoowoohooo legs and your thighs like that of Shakeela. Lungi is worn such a way to show supremacy and seduce neighbour chicks with your sexy hairy legs. A mallu can play cricket, foot ball or any ball when the lungi is worn in half mast.A mallu can even climb a coconut tree by wearing lungi in half mast.

"It's not a good idea to look up on a mallu when he is on a coconut tree"- Sorcerer

Most mallu's celebrate the traditional dance festival the -"kudiyattam" ("Kudi" means drinking alcohol and yattam,spelled as "aattam" meaning random movement of body.Note that 'y' is silent.When you are drinking , you drink, there is no 'y'.) wearing a lungi. Any alcohol related "festival" can be enjoyed to the maximum when you are dressed in the traditional attire that is topless with lungi and with a towel tied around the head.
"It's easy to dance and shake the legs" says an expert in 'kudiyaattam'.

The 'Lungi Wearing Mallu Union' [LUWMU, pronounced LOVE MU], a union which works towards the 'upliftment' of lungi cult, strongly disagree the younger generation's trend of wearing Burmuda under the lungi. They say that making youngsters wear Burmuda under the lungi is a hidden agenda by the CIA.

"When we were their age, we fought for the freedom of movement, and we protested for it by wearing nothing under our lungi; We have spilled many things for it."- Says a very senior person of LUWMU.
"It's a disgrace to see a person wearing burmuda with corporate logos under his lungi.What they don't know is, how much these corporates are limiting their freedom of movment and expression". He adds.

A malayali wears lungi round the year, all climates, all seasons. It's like a second skin. Unlike 'summer dress','monsoon fashion' etc etc a mallu has one fashion only!Lungi fashion that does not fade or change from season to season.According to the mallu philosophy, the better way to celebrate the winter is by wearing lungi with floral pattern.Good.No?

Lungi provides a good ventilation system round the year. A mallu is scared of global warming more than anyone else in the world.

A lungi/mundi can be worn any time of the day/night. [Some double it as blanket at night.] It also doubles up as swimwear, parachute, facemask, shopping basket,water filter,sleeping bag , a swing.etc etc. When these lungi's are decommissioned from service,they become table cloths..Hmm...The options are endless. There should be a subject in colleges called "Applied Lungionics'.

According to some reports the reason behind the low productivity [Should not be confused with population] in kerala is due to the fact that 80% of the productive working hour is spend for wearing the lungi at half mast. No wonder that wearing lungi/mundu properly is an added career skill.The population figures show that 'productivity' increases when people don't wear lungi/mundu..hence proved.

The first thing a lungi n00b does after waking up from his bed is to search for his lungi.It takes a while before the lungi actually manages to stick to the waist of the person wearing it. The 'lungi/mundu pulling competition' is done in households having many youngsters. Such lungi pulling competition happens during the ONAM and Vishu festival seasons. Most of the time the big time victims of the 'lungi/mundu pulling competition' are n00bs who happens to be from gelf. Their parents, boast about their 'kiddos' not knowing how to wear 'mundu/lungi' [*sigh] and say that this dress is not suited while driving camels.

Its rumoured that few corporate educational centers [which managed to survive in Kerala] are actually planning to start a certification course in 'Lungi Wearing'. These courses are mainly aimed at NRI's. It's estimated that these educational centers will make lots of revenue during the festival season.
It's hard for the younger generation to 'uphold' the tradition on their waist. Soon there would be a compulsory course in Lungi wearing in schools and colleges. The Kerala Government has actually, urged the people to wear traditional clothes on Saturdays, to save the Khadi industry, which actually is a good thing.
____________________

I think a lungi/mundu is the best invention after the invention of fire.
__________________________+


43 comments:

Clipped.in - Explore Indian blogs said...

The technique of wearing a lungi/mundu is passed on from generation to generation through verbal communication. :-)

cheers from another lungi fan :-)

Nipun said...

Will surely wear a lungi after reading this.
It coul even become the national under dress for India..:)
Awesome post Sorcy.

Cheers

Nuts

rohini said...

wow....such an informative post on Lungi....must say....after reading this , lungi can be the national dress....and you will be regarded as the one who created the revotion in the fashion industry.....half mast & full mast is ok...any new ventilations u can provide in it....new designs u c...

Swetha Guptha said...

"Applied Lungionics'???? ha ha heights of imagination!!!!

Rachna said...

Really hilarious! It has always intrigued me as to how this lungi does not come off. Even petticoats need cords. :)

Wicked Witch of the West said...

Oooh, funny AND educational...and very relevant to me given that I hit Kerala later this year...had never thought about the breath thing. Seems totally sensible to me...especially when you see everyone here in 39 degree weather walking around in trousers, long sleeved shirts, ties and often jackets...I reckon I should try and make it catch on in Australia...am sure all the males at work would be much happier in comfortable and cool attire (and for suuuure I would be in salwar kameez...not just prettier, but ah the bliss of a cotton one on a hot day)

SindhuBhairavi said...

thanneyokke enthaa cheyyande?? i just read the first line :) i will read the rest later.. national bird!! :)

Sorcerer said...

@sindhubhairavi
njan sherikkum endu pava..
thank you .do come back and comment


@WWW
you should try and visit all mallu places..buy some communists as suvenier.(i have a feeling the spelling is wrong)
lungi is awesome dress..people should try it

@Rachna
lungi is prettier than pretty coats with cords

thanks for ze comment

@Swetha
yeah...my gray cells generated enough heat to make a chicken biryani

@nipun
thanks for the comment
you should try this awesome fashion thingy


@rohini
hmm..actually we mallus take pride in simblicity .no?

so..so far..we have reached what all can be done with the lungi.

@clipped
thank you for the comment

°ღ•ℛŐŶÁĹ ÐΞŚ℘ΞℛÁÐŐ●•٠·˙ said...

Marvelous Post!!!!But dont forget that you are also a "Sorcy" creature in the Mallu Kingdom!!!!!


Note:Athikam kaliyakendattol ette!!!

Sorcerer said...

@royal
nee po mone Dinosa..
Hari mone..ammamu undu kidakkan ayille?

HARI NANDAKUMAR said...

DONT PLAY WITH RD's we will report abuse
he he he
:-)

Sorcerer said...

@hari
Abuso?
ninde blogine njangal Gang bangum..your blog will have lil kids with vitamin deficiency..
venda ttol!!

Insignia said...

Liked the half-mast and full mast concept. Kerala lungis are colorful and floral patterned..its nice

Sorcerer said...

@insignia
thanks for the comment

COMMUNI said...

Not even 24hour-lungi-wearing-mallu would have thought so much about his lungi. After reading this, I guess we ought to go the parliament for making lungi as a national-dress.

susie said...

ROFL sorc..:P u can extend it to whole of south india.. :D :D

buzzzzzzzzz... said...

There should be a subject in colleges called "Applied Lungionics'...LOLzzzzzieee.....
jeez ....
i want sorcy to teach us in dis fashion skool ...!!history of clothing,wud suk a lil less.

Anonymous said...

Lungi? You wrote an entire blogpost on lungi.. you could write about anything under the sun.

How do you come up with these every single day?
Impressive :)

-R.

Barbie Jones said...

Bu9z-buzz,wow you are a better detective than me,picking up on the fashion sense that Sorce has.And he is creative as well.And another thing I like about him is that he freely admits he is close to his mother, that is a good sign that he will treat his future wife extremely well even bring coffee to her in bed.Sorce when will you give us your chicken Bwhatyoumacallit recipe?You keep teasing us with it,it must be a delis dish.

SindhuBhairavi said...

:) am awake with an aching neck early in the morning and smiling all the while the last few mins.. thanks! you are crossing the limits! the limits of awsomeness!! :) keep it up!

i LOVED this post!!!!!

P. Venugopal said...

You seem to have covered all aspects of the subject. :-)

Wicked Witch of the West said...

Oh, I plan to visit as many as possible. And lol would love to take a communist home as souvenir (you were close)...but as it would cut down on the amount of Himalaya products, clothes and home products I could take home, I will have to give that a miss.

They do seem great...very sensible given the climate and adaptability (a lot of clothes worn in hot climates make no sense at all!)

Saadi said...

Marriage and strikes?! Lol...u certainly hav guts to put these two in the same group! :p

'sexy hairy awesome one of a kind bombastic yoohoowoohoo legs' = ROFLMAO!

Floral prints...hehehehe...omg, Sorcy...u hav a killer instinct fr comedy!

supriya said...

leave everything else...im still pinching myself to believe that you actually wrote a full-fledged post on "lungi" ..!!! goshhhhh...!!

Sorcerer said...

@supriya
yes..this is true...you aint dreaming..hahaha

@saadi
thanks for the comment buddy!
seems like you are online during the weekends only.

@www
yeah,they are cool fashion thingy

@P.Venugopal
Thank you sir, for the comment.
Nice to see you back in Blogville

@Sindhu Bhairavi
thank you for the comment

@barbiejones
thanks for the comment

@R
thanks for the comment

@buzz
haha...yeah..applied lungionics...should be a mandatory subject

@susie
yeah..thats the devious plan..
muahahahahahahah

@communi
yeah..i dink thats a good thing.
govt can give free lungis for summer

@

smitzy said...

yay!! Lungi post!!! :D
are u a mallu? if yes, then your LOVE for anything and everything mallu (lungi in this case) is AWE-INSPIRING.. keep it up!!

Sorcerer said...

@smitzy
yeah I am a 100 % mallu 0% cotton ghinty.

yojitA said...

lol lol lol lol!!!! :) :)
the mallu thing is hilarious!!! but i enjoyed all through!!!

Siddhesh 'Ravan' Kabe said...

Lungi...ok seriously....lungi...:P

think a lungi/mundu is the best invention after the invention of fire.

Wenever I see a person in Lungi...i feel like pulling it...:D

Four Dinners said...

I...erm...well I....um...erm...let me go back and start again....

you keep yer hands to yerself Siddhesh!

Rajlakshmi said...

Hahaha that is insanely hillarious.. Lungi!! Omg! I couldnt stop laughing... Absolute fun reading it.

anishthomas said...

Lungi provides a good ventilation system round the year
n00b does after waking up from his bed is to search for his lungi.It takes a while before....ROFL ,can't agree more than this.
At times lungi serve the purpose of bedsheet\blanket also :D

do check out this link also

Sorcerer said...

@anishthomas
thanks for the comment and the link

@rajilakshmi
thanks for the comment

@fourdinners
hahahahaha.. thanks for the comment

@Siddhesh
haha..thats a cultural competition actually.thanks for the comment


@yojitha
thank you for the comment

Prameela said...

This post seems to come from a true blue malayali chekkan...you seem to have done all the research possible on this enigmatic attire ;)
Great post!

Sorcerer said...

@prameela
aye aye.. how very true.
thanks for the comment

smitzy said...

cotton GHINTY??? WAHAAHAHAHA wat in the world is THAT?? :D

Sorcerer said...

@smitzy
GHINTY!
oh..I remember that was the CAPCHA[image verification] thingy.I was to type..
It happens..happens.when you are blogging while low on coffeee

Anonymous said...

far narthindians it can be kalled dhi hwa hwaii!!

കലേഷ് കുമാര്‍ said...

I liked your post. It is very good and funny, but I disagree with the following points:
1) Wearing something on the top half of your body is optional when you are wearing a lungi. This is the reason why females are not found wearing this awesome dress. [*sigh]

Wrong. I have seen many mallu females wearing lungis.Infact, before something called "Maxi" (which is now the de-facto common dress of middle aged-middle class and below mallu women) became the choice of females, they based on their caste or financial status wore either lungi or mundu with blouse. Now it is either mundu or maxi or churidar. Lungi is worn by still worn by women who belongs to the lower strata of the society.

2)The first thing a lungi n00b does after waking up from his bed is to search for his lungi.It takes a while before the lungi actually manages to stick to the waist of the person wearing it.

This is wrong. Being a mallu who wears lungi at night, I have never searched for lungi after waking up. If you wear the lungi properly, it wont go anywhere.

I also have to say that during the highs of "Kudiyattam" ( I liked that word), the mallu will take of the lungi and will tie it around his head and dance.

One more thing. Lungi is also called "Kaili" in some parts of Kerala and towards Trivandrum, it is known as "Pesha".

aby said...

so bloody cool
"thilakkunnu chora njarambil"
nice work dude!!!

Sunil said...

"Wearing a lungi and managing to keep it up there is tougher than flying a MIG. I can fly a MIG with eyes closed, but not wear a lungi..*sigh:- A retired MIG pilot who doesn't liked to be named.

I would totally agree with this, though I do not have any experience of the second part (flying a MIG), but plenty on the first part.

I still struggle with wearing a lungi right AND having it on place, come what may!

btw, let me know if we have an authoritative resource on how to do it right & for long ;). instructables on wearing a lungi ?!?!

Sorcerer said...

@sunil
haha..thanks for the comment
yeah.these posts are just my social service for the man kind..

@aby
yes...yes...should boil..all the way

thanks for the comment

@Kalesh Kumar
thanks for the comment
yeah..gone are those chemmeen days of karuthmma!!
*sigh
yeah...you must be master in the art of lungi wearing..unlike some n00bs

yeah.thats so awsome ..dance..

Neethu said...

lol..i gt this as a forward few days back...but without any trace of 'socerism' nywer...was wondering why the writing style was sooo familiar...n now i found out why!!

looks lyk ur posts are being flicked and wildly circulated too ;)