Tuesday, February 23, 2010

.:: GIRL POWER ::.


I can drop you off at your place" called out the stranger.

He was a stranger to me, though we both share the same Eco system and watering hole. In the rain forest called office, he lives on the other side of the forest.There is only one waterhole where all endangered animals come to have bits and bytes of idli's and vada's.

It was an offer I can't refuse that day, cuz of some personal schedules I had to keep up with.

"I don't call this my car..." he said
"Yeah!! I can see that" I replied, cuz technically it should be a cross between municipal truck and shopping cart.
"I call this my magic carpet" he beamed it up, very proudly.
"Sure, the carpet could do with some vacuuming" Well, I really wanted to say that..but..I didn't , cuz, he is the one who is driving the flying contraption.
"Sit in the navigator's seat, back seat is my bedroom when she kicks me out." my friend said.
So, my friend is in the endangered species red list.Poor thing, only thing that differentiate him from a blue whale is that he isn't blue.
I climbed into the 'navigators' seat with a cross between smile and frown on my face :-s
..
..

Well,thanks for the olfactory adaptation. My nose is very well adapted to the smell of beer+cigarette+ freshener and other smells which could leave a tiny mark on machine. Still, there was something in the smell that was bothering me.The incense sticks on the dashboard answered that query.
..
..

My friend, who flies the magic carpet, pushed the gear into drive and off we go honking into the awesome Bangalore traffic.He looked at his watch and was dodging his way through the traffic. I was happy cuz, I could reach home early .
But...

"Dude, I need to pick my friend. Let us wait near that..." He said

Okay! I said.
He sure knows how to find a descent parking space. We parked the car near a famous college.

Conscious: You gonna be late.

Me: I know. I got a reason.

Conscious: Yes, You expect some hot chick to be his friend .

Me:I said, I got a reason to tell to the personal schedule.

Conscious:Do you expect any girl to climb into this car that smell like an African Warthog.

Me:oh! I don't have personal experience with Warthogs.

Conscious: But..I do.

I was getting impatient, waiting for "his friend".

[ roll eyes]
"Errr...." I said. [ Lions say Grrrrrrr... Sorcerer says Errrrrr]
[/roll eyes]

"We will wait a few more minutes and then go..." . My friend replied to my err.
After waiting for another 10 minutes, the magic carpet was back bouncing on the road dodging traffice like a belly dancer dodging beer bottles on the stage.
..
..

A few more kilometers and ...
"Dude, I think we can get a parking spot there...." He said pointing to a place near another awesome college.
The advantage of having this kind of magic carpet is that, you can squeeze it into any space. This place was much better than the previous place with much much better view.
"Cool!! " That was the only word that came out of my mouth. The word 'Cool' is like 'Fcuk'. It could mean everything and anything.

Conscious: *sigh

Me: I am 'in' the 'situation.'

Conscious:Do you really think, he is waiting for his friend.

Me: I don't know. But the view is good.You are witnessing the great migration of pink flamingos.

Conscious:Huh!

The Bangalore minutes ticked by.

..
..
After an hour and half I reached my home. I had to cancel the personal schedule giving one of those fables.
____________________


I used to meet him at the water hole almost every day and we used to crack jokes about everything bare under the sun with sunscreen.

Later one day, he confessed to me that, 'some people unwind by driving on the curves, he unwinds by staring on the curves'.

Conscious:So, I was right, he was not waiting for his friend the other day.

Me: Apparently.You thought he was trying to rhyme?

Months went by, the color of building changed from off white to blue, the trees shed their leaves, freshers came out of their cocoon and started showing their real colors in the rain forest. The H.R colored her hair bling bling brown.

..
..
One day at the wate hole, we found a new chick.
'Solitary Chick inbound, 3 O Clock. non hostile.' called out one sentry.

Her dress reflected the economy during the great recession.She was like a major corporate during the recession, too much assets and too little to cover it with.

It was 'every man for himself' situation.[ For single guys, this is always the situation, *sigh]. People with technical skills relied on that, others were left with the highly pressurized promise from Axe Deo Spray.

My magic carpet friend was not really interested in the n00b chick at the water hole. I could read 'disgust' on his face. He was giving all other guys who was looking at her 'that' look.
I having awesome communication skill decided to 'reason' with the magic carpet friend about his 'insensitive' behavior towards the n00b chick and us, before we came to our senses.

Me:Hey!! So, we got a n00b. No?

Magic Carpet Friend: Huh!! Why you guyz behaving this way?She is a girl.
He gets up and walks out. Stopping the communication abruptly like someone knocking on your door in the middle of your "me time."

Conscious:Was that his Halloween costume?

Me:I think this is what sleeping in the backseat of a car can do to you.EEEEWWW!!! Very Scary..Very Scary!!!

Somewhere in my mind my friend's behavior left a mark like ketchup stain on white t-shirt. I just didn't understand about this change; off all , his. My mind was left with too many questions.

1) Is the judgment day near? If so , did they move it back a few years?
2)Does hell really exist and is it a no party zone?
3)Did something happen to the backseat on his magic carpet?
4)Did he unwind at a lady cop in civilian clothes?
5)Is he turning into a lesbian?
..
..

After much deep and profound brain thinking inside my head, I made this theory long back that "Rumors are like fart, you just need to be at the right wind direction to get its stink".

All the while I was standing up the wind and I had missed the information. Now I was down the wind like the standards on Chinese Toys.
Next day, I got the answer I was looking for. "The magic carpet buddie's wife had given birth to a girl kid a few days back."

__________________________+

37 comments:

supriya said...

loved it...really..! and thanks for the "rumor thought"...i really needed to hear that. And cheers to your magic carpet friend for his celebration..lol..!

Sorcerer said...

@supriya
thank you for the comment

Sorcerer said...

@supriya
thank you for the comment

Sakshi said...

This is THE way, the Indian Male mentality goes. Unless you have a sister, a daughter to take care of, you never realise how 'the unwinding' can be so disgusting.

rohini said...

came with a bang...nice post....

buzzzzzzzzz... said...

a not so pervert post after long...
luvd it!!..
Rumors are like fart, you just need to be at the right wind direction to get its stink....
LMAO!!

DILLIGAF said...

How odd. I don't recall being in Bangalore and giving you a lift.

Must be my Alzheimers kicking in again....;-)

smitzy said...

LOL hahahahahaa.. awesome!!! that quote: "Rumors are like fart, you just need to be at the right wind direction to get its stink" How do you come up with stuff like this :D

Good to see you make your comeback with a solid post :)

Sorcerer said...

@smitzy
thank you for the comment.
yeah.that was a come back post :) nice to know that you people liked it

@fourdinners
hahahaha..thanks..your comments are witty

@buzz
haha..yeah..thought I would stay away from the perverted way.just for this post

@rohini
thanks for the regular visits and the comments

@sakshi
thats exactly what I wanted to say through the post.
reality...sucks..aint it?

@

Maya said...

nice as always,, and ur writing is improving, it was more funnier

chitra said...

Sorci,
How you churn stories, really amazing:)

Chandni (Chanz) said...

ROTFLMAO...

See, now you realise what a daughter can do to "you".. err to your manhood..

Anonymous said...

coooooooooool ;~)

Sorcerer said...

@yemiledu
thank you for the comment

@chanz
errrr...thanks for the comment

@chitra
thanks for the comment

@uncommon sense
thank you for the comment

Sid said...

Superb dude... so d perv changed his perspective once he had a girl kid. Believe all parents should have 1 girl child... then there will no dearth for single guys :P

KittySigurdardottir. said...

A man turning into a lesbian.Is that a femaleman?I just read about one.Now that would cause a draft if one would be standing down wind from the stink of that rumor.

Shruti Narayanan said...

i came along after a long time. things sounds 'so normal' ur side :)

really appretiated the way u described 'passing of time' "freshers came out of cocoon n showed tru colours" :)

good work buddy!! ur blog always makes me smile !

Chithira Menon said...

i loved the ending..neat..:)

sm said...

like the story
magic carpet

Megha said...

Mix of philosophy and humor ? Nice :)

Anonymous said...

You gone soft, Sorcy?

KittySigurdardottir. said...

Nahhh,DF you can tell by some of his stories that he has only went semi soft,but quite comfortably so.He's still in hot pursue after hot chicks with a smile on his face.

Saadi said...

'the highly pressurized promise from Axe Deo Spray.'

Lol....u rocked that one!!!

N yea...awesome write-up! Classically funny and loaded with Sorcidom! ;)

Unknown said...

Bangalore Minutes?! I LOVE it! It's describes every bit of the traffic, the noise, the mounting impatience, the smoke and the sighs of surrender to it all.

angel from heaven said...

Another mazing write up so funny and full of humour,Sorry not been around for a while to post comments will try and be back for more soon.Pls accept award in my blog.

Sumi Mathai said...

heyya! so i hope n i wish u a baby girl too, someday. dont u want to free urself of all this burden, sorcy?

Anonymous said...

It fed her every emotion, prodding her anger and settling an icy lacing on despair. It filled in the cracks that had formed when she exploded, when shed fallen apart. We may have even convinced ourselves that we dont feel what we feel for them. He raised one eyebrow. Someone was there to help her. He came up beside her, extinguishing the magelight. Gala caught Eyrhaen watching them and smiled. Hyle was there, kneeling beside her. Brevin had called them teasing on more than one occasion. Ive treated you all miserably in the past, because I could, because you let me. Maybe shed broken that too. She sneered, twisting in his hold. I didnt say we werent mad. Tykirs cock slid deliciously through her hands, the oils from his skin coating her palms. Over, he commanded with a light slap to the side of her hip. He rolled his hips into her, taking his time in building toward climax. For you, came his hidden thought, I would make time. He sat in the chair, watching her. She blinked, thankful that hed broached the subject. She met his gaze seriously.

Anonymous said...

10 days and no post...What happening to the world? This is very much unlike u..

geeta said...

Girls do have lots of power...
literally humorous ...loved reading it .....

Again a long gap ....

Haddock said...

ha ha enjoyed reading this.
(the ending was perfect)

KittySigurdardottir. said...

Are you under the weather by any chance Sorcerer?Or are you just taking a break from blogging?It's got me concerned.Or maybe you RUSHED into getting hitched.

subu.ps said...

Another very very creative stuff. Lots of quotes in it too. worth a reread to go through it all again.

Comparing corporate world in Recession with clothing - Only u can do that man.

And u surely made many valid points in this post.

Simplyfood said...

http://simplysensationalfood.blogspot.com/2010/02/thankyou-and-awards.html
pls collect award

Anonymous said...

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NesQuarX said...

Not done Sorc, Too less of the chick here...

Jokes apart, you're fun as usual!

Sorcerer said...

@nesquarx
thank you

@anonymous
errr

@simplyfood
thank you..thank you

@subu
thank you..thank you for the comment

@haddock
thank you for the visit and the comment

@geeta
thanks for the comment
Yes..I am back

@dilonrocks
my latest post answers that absence..
thanks for the comment

@me
ha ha..thank you

@angel
thank you for the comment

@republic of chic
thanks you for the comment

@saadi
thank you buddy.thanks for the comment

@dame
nope..Me soft
err..hmm

@Megha
thank you for the comment

@sm
thank you for the comment

@shruthi
Thank you for the comment

@sid
thanks for the comment

Pratik Gupta said...

Killer max bro!! :)